we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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