Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
