David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
