turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Send help, water and tortillas.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Randomize