There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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