like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Ladies don't puke and tell
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
