is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize