He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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