it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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