Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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