I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I will die if light touches me.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
