thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
