my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
