I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I know her cup size but not her name....
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize