hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
