the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
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