Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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