No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
