im drinking this country out of the recession.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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