i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
