tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
