So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
