Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
ok first of all what the fuck
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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