i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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