We won't sleep together?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
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