K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
should my penis look like a turkey
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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