its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
