is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize