I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
