he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
You pole danced in your parka.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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