I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
