This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
