The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
