i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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