you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
