i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
How external is "for external use only"?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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