I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Dick very happy bro
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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