Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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