he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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