i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
