you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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