To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
