wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
