Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
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