Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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