They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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