i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Dignity is for republicans.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
