I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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