you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
