His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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